Wednesday, May 5, 2010

5 sentence review of "The Losers"

5. A couple buddies and I made a bet Sunday afternoon: Which of us could see the worst movie currently playing at the multiplexes; they picked "A Nightmare on Elm Street" remake/reboot/whatever and I chose "The Losers," based on a DC Comic book series.

4. I opted against "Nightmare," because even in junior high -- the obvious target audience for Freddy Kreuger -- I wasn't interested in this melted-face weirdo with a bad sweater and a wanna-be Wolverine glove.

3. "The Losers" made me a winner insofar as I left my theater entertained -- or at least mildly amused while my friends were bored, annoyed and insulted by the wretchedness of "Nightmare."

2. There isn't much worth noting about "The Losers" other than in my theater, there were a pair of obnoxious, Skittles-throwing preteen boys that made me think, "If I were their age, "This Losers" flick would be some "A+" stuff."

1. Alas, I'm old enough to have seen enough poorly-shaven tough guys walking in slow-motion while stuff blows up behind them to see "The Losers" as a mostly a collection of action cliches best suited to those on the verge of growing their first chest hair rather than those of us trying to keep hair on our scalps and out of our ears.

"The Losers"

1hr 38min‎‎ - Rated PG-13‎‎ - Action/Adventure/Suspense/Thriller/Drama‎

Director: Sylvain Whit

Cast: Zoe Saldana, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Idris Elba, Columbus Short, Óscar Jaenada

Finney's Flicks Rating: C

1 comment:

  1. #1 is a long damn sentence, but a really nicely crafted one (and I don't even try to keep hair on my scalp or out of my ears; seems a losing battle).